Our Lifebook: A Baby Story

Famous last words: "I intend to deliver naturally, without an epidural, and with minimal medical interventions..." 14 hours of Pitocin, doctor breaking my water, 3 hours of "natural" labor, an epidural, countless liters of fluid, and a c-section later, I had a baby. Things never quite work out as planned.

That's ok though...I had a baby! And here's the story.

*Fair warning, could be TMI (too much information).

We arrived at the hospital before dawn on Friday, October 26th to begin induction since I was a week overdue. I wore my cute gown a friend gave me, and I was ready to start this marathon, planning to use my breathing techniques and laboring positions to get through. After Pitocin started, we watched the monitor as the contractions started and became more regular. I felt them, but just barely. I stayed in bed as the nurse suggested I save my energy.

Our parents visited us as well as some visitors from church, and labor was a piece of cake! Until the doctor came in around 1:30 and broke my water since I had not progressed 7 hours after Pitocin was started. Almost immediately the contractions got hard. HARD. I got out of bed and sat on the labor ball, handed Ben the back massager, and demanded he press it into my back during every contraction. And they came fast. FAST. Barely any time between them.

Now I've been watching TLC's "A Baby Story" like it's my job for the past 2 months, criticizing and analyzing each woman's labor experience. When they complained, I told them to breathe or walk or move. When they moaned or yelled, I snickered.

Well I tried breathing and walking and moving. I sat, I stood, I swayed, I got on all fours on the bed, I leaned, I walked, I moaned. To compound this, the IV fluids necessitated frequent trips to the bathroom, which involved unhooking the 2 monitors strapped to my belly and tossing the wires over my shoulder, unplugging the IV and steering the IV pole behind me, all while attempting to keep my "water" from making a trail behind me all the way to the bathroom. It was sort of constraining.

I'm not sure I can describe the pain, but it was definitely painful. Sort of all encompassing, couldn't really focus on anything else type pain in my lower back and abdomen. Each contraction started really bad, then got almost unbearable, then barely eased up until it was over. They lasted for more than a minute each. Break for 10-30 seconds, start again. 3 hours of this, and I demanded to see if any progress had been made.

I only gained one measly centimeter for working the hardest I ever have for 3 hours straight. Ugh! So I called the nurse and asked for an epidural. Knowing my birth plan did not include this, the nurse gave me a wonderful speech of encouragement and told me she didn't want to hear me mention it again. Tough love. So I agreed and labored on...until the very next contraction when I was reminded that I did, in fact, want the epidural. I think I made Ben call her that time, again requesting the epidural. Again the nurse encouraged me, saying "you can do this". My response: "I know, but I don't WANT to do this anymore!" And I didn't. Soon the anesthesiologist visited and administered the epidural and I was happy.

It's sort of funny that I don't think one person has asked me directly about my decision to get an epidural since I said at first I wouldn't have one. I suppose it seems like a sore subject, but it's not. I don't feel defeated or sad or weak. I would still classify my birth experience as a positive one, and I'm glad I labored for 3 hours, but I'm also glad I got the epidural.

So sometime around 8pm the baby's heart rate was consistently dropping with each contraction. They put oxygen on me and moved me from side to side, and stopped the Pitocin which made the contractions weaker. They monitored his heart rate closely for the next hour, but it contined to dip, even though the contractions were weaker. So I was prepped for a C-section.

I'm pretty sure this is when I started to cry, and I didn't stop for at least an hour. I was just weepy, and it had been such a long day, and there were so many emotions. I was so excited that I was about to meet my boy, nervous about the surgery, and relieved that it was all almost over. The anesthesia made me shake, and the anesthesiologist clearly thought I was losing it, as he assured me he could give me something for anxiety just after the baby was born that would make me sleep and not remember. Through chattering teeth, I assured him I was just fine and did not want anything for anxiety, and surely did want to remember every single thing.

The C-section seemed to go very quickly, and it was no time at all until they lifted our baby boy over the blue sheet and I actually felt my heart fill up with love for him. There are no words for seeing your baby for the first time.

Family of 3

Ben and Wesley

Today Wesley James is 11 days old. I could just sit and watch him all day. He's already changed so much. It's been an amazing experience and we're so glad we've been able to share it with our parents and many other friends and family who have visited.